Talking to Kids About the Death of a Pet

A beloved pet is part of the family. The love shared is incomparable. Most likely, we will outlive our precious pets, and children may experience this tragic loss right along with us. It can be a very difficult time for your child. Here are some tips to explain to kids what has happened and how to cope with the death of a pet. It won’t be easy, but hopefully these steps will make this tough time go a little smoother.

Be Honest

No matter the age of your child, honesty is always the best policy. Your child will know that her pet is gone and it is up to you to be forthcoming about what happened. If the pet was sick, you should explain that the illness could not be cured and the pet has passed. Be sure she doesn’t become frightened and believe that all sick pets (or people) will die if they are sick. Let her know that this only happens sometimes and she does not need to worry. If there was a fatal accident, while you needn’t go into detail, do explain what happened so she doesn’t wonder why her pet is suddenly gone. Discuss what happens when a pet dies based on your own ideas, faith, or religious beliefs. Do not say the pet “went to sleep” or ran away or some other untruth. Your child deserves to know what happened and can ask questions along the way as she processes the details and finality of the situation.

The Pet is No Longer Suffering

Help your child realize that the positive side of your pet’s passing is that he or she is no longer in pain or suffering in any way. While the death may be painful to your child, the pet is now free. This may help your child go through her stages of mourning with a sense of peace for her beloved pet.

Don’t Hide Your Own Sadness

The death of a pet is difficult for us all, no matter our age or parental status. Though you may want to be strong for your child, you are allowed to and should grieve as well. Kids understand that parents have emotions too, and even if you don’t consciously display your sadness, more than likely your child will sense it anyhow. Together, you can cry, hug, mourn, and go through the loss together as a family. The bonding will bring you closer and help ease the pain.

Memorialize

It’s always healing to remember the good times you had with your pet. Set up a shrine, put up photos, or make a photo album to remember your special pet. Perhaps your child would like to write a poem or draw pictures of her late pet. Once the sadness starts to fade, the happy memories will take its place. No pet should ever be forgotten and memorializing the pet is a wonderful way to make it through the sorrow. Your pet will be your child’s forever angel and the love will never die.

Have you lost a family pet? How did you help your child make it through the grieving period? For more information like this, please visit All My Children.

By: Melissa A. Kay