When Someone Dips from Your Bucket: How to Stay Kind and Strong
It’s easy to be kind when others are kind to us. However, what happens when someone says something mean or leaves us out? In this week’s blog post, we’re helping kids and families explore what it means when someone “dips” from your bucket, and how to protect your heart without dipping back.
At AMC, we teach children that every kind word or action fills someone else’s emotional bucket. But life isn’t always easy, and even young children quickly learn that not everyone is a bucket filler all the time.
Sometimes a friend says something hurtful. Sometimes we get left out. These moments are called bucket dips, and they’re part of every child’s experience. But here’s the powerful part:
We can learn to protect our own bucket and still choose kindness.
💔 What Is Bucket Dipping?
A bucket dip happens when someone’s words or actions make your heart feel a little emptier. It might look like:
- A friend not including you in a game
- Someone using unkind words
- A sibling ignoring or teasing you
- A peer taking a toy without asking
These things can feel hurtful, but they don’t mean you did something wrong.
🚪 How to Stay Kind When Someone Dips
Here are simple, age-appropriate ways kids can protect their buckets when others are unkind:
- 🗣️ Use your words: “That wasn’t kind,” or “Please don’t talk to me like that.”
- 🧘 Take a breath: Calm your body before reacting.
- 🚪 Walk away: Sometimes the kindest choice is to move on.
- 🪣 Fill your own bucket again: Talk to a trusted grown-up, take a break, draw, or be with someone who fills you back up.
- ✨ Choose not to dip back: It takes strength to stay kind. And it keeps your bucket full.
💬 A Message for Families
When your child comes home upset, those are powerful teaching moments. Help them name what happened, how it made them feel, and what they can try next time. Remind them:
When someone dips from your bucket, you can still keep yours full.
At AMC, we believe that even tough moments can grow compassion, strength, and emotional courage.
📖 Book Recommendation for Children
“Have You Filled a Bucket Today? A Guide to Daily Happiness for Kids”
By Carol McCloud, illustrated by David Messing
Recommended for ages 4–9
This heartwarming picture book introduces the concept of bucket filling in a way that children can easily understand. It encourages kindness, empathy, and emotional awareness, while also teaching kids what to do when someone dips from their bucket. A perfect story to spark conversations at home.
🔗 Resources for Parents: Supporting Bucket Filler Kindness in Tough Moments
Want to learn more about how to help your child handle unkind behavior while staying emotionally strong? These trusted resources offer practical tools, language, and emotional support:
- How to Deal With Bucket Dipping – Education Resource Group
- Helping Kids Cope with Unkind Behavior at School – Gateway to Solutions
- 6 Tips to Help Your Child with Peer Problems – GreatSchools
- Help Children Build Resilience – StopBullying.gov
- Promoting Emotional Resilience in Children – Social Workers Toolbox
These articles provide tips, real-life examples, and language you can use with your child the next time their bucket feels a little low.
Written by Goldie Narboni